i like being idle every once in a while. gives me time to think about stuff.
this time, life. my life.
so far i think i never had it super tough. (yes, there were really devastating moments but truth be told i have it easy.)
i’m not going to be humble.
i’ve brains. yes i make enemies, but i believe i’ve made more friends. i’ve two beautiful brothers, pretty awesome parents, and i’m in university. without a loan.
yeah i know we nearly took a loan but hey it’s about cutting down on the less necessary things in life so i’m not on loan.
if my younger brother doesn’t get a scholarship i’ll gladly sponsor him through university. i owe him quite a bit.
oh and grades. i have it good.
generally there’s very few things which i set my heart on doing and i don’t do well.
of course right now the largest question for me is to do honors or not?
i don’t intend to. but so many people around me are saying i should. various reasons.
1. it’s a few hundred dollars more starting pay.
2. i can do it. i’m set to stay on honors track anyway.
3. if they were me they’ll do it. because an extra year of school will be better than an extra year of work.
of course, in the first place the course, rather the major, i’m taking is rather… interesting. it’s so interesting that on first glance the fields i can apply jobs for is very limited. as if i can only work for japanese companies.
i took it because i’ve interest. i know i always go around saying how much i hate researching for my major modules but truth be told, my major has opened my eyes to every single field possible. history, sociology, cinema studies, anthropology, literature…
that’s the thing about people, actually. we take the “pragmatic” approach. choose the course which guarantees a stable job. additional plus if it has higher starting pay. stick to that job and let many many form of obligations become bonds that at the end of the day, we feel suffocated. uninspired. life becomes a chore.
i’m not saying we should throw obligations out of the window, but surely there is a way to negotiate such that both areas, obligations and our individuality, are not compromised?
personally i think we overlooked the fact that studying, while we’re being schooled, is the only period of time when it’s okay to experiment, make mistakes, and really learn how us, as individuals, work. then as we gradually near the end of our studying career, we learn how to assert our interests without compromising obligations.
i have it good. my parents only interfered when i was deciding which secondary school to go to. everything else, they let me choose my own path. my mom later on told me it was because they know there’s no use trying to persuade me to take the path they think is better because i won’t listen. and they decided to let me be and hope that i learn to be responsible for the choices i make. (i still secretly think that initially they were hoping i regret my choices and go back to them crying and begging them to help me make my choices from there on because “parents know best”. but i didn’t. and the choices i made were pretty good.)
so basically, i chose my own CCA (and joined band, which pretty much sucked up all my free time but i loved it), my subject combination, my JC and the course to take then, and then university.
and yeah, they didn’t even bat an eyelid when i told them i only applied for NUS but i could only enter two courses, one of which i skipped the aptitude test (it was architecture), so essentially i either make it to FASS, or not.
so, you can tell i’m not really a “pragmatic” person. and it’s ok because a) i’m a girl i don’t have such concerns and b) i can always marry a rich man and not worry about practical issues.
NO.
first, the number of rich, eligible bachelors in singapore is as much as the number of singapore students getting scholarships to study overseas. NOT A LOT. i need to feed myself.
heck, the guys here might be more of a spendthrift than me (think gadgets. it’s usually the gadgets).
second, i do have practical concerns. we’re not really well-off so basically from young my younger brother and i have been taught to think about such things.
it may seem that taking a course in B(A) with a major in japanese studies doesn’t reflect that, but let me remind you i like what i do in university.
and i won’t let obligations bring me down. i refuse to let life become a chore. with a degree which i got from learning things that interest me, i’m pretty sure i’ll be able to find a job which interests me too.
and extra year of work is an extra year of experience and if i work it well enough, by the time the honors students of my batch graduate i probably would have gotten a pay raise. and i’ll be at least “on par” with them in terms of pay. BUT, with one extra year of experience.
live with the flow. i’ve been doing that for some time now. having a general idea of where i want to be and working with the flow so i end up where i want to be.
learning is a lifelong lesson. but i’m pretty sure by my 3rd year there’s nothing more the institute can offer me so rather than delaying my entry to the “adult world” by a year i’d rather start learning the remaining life lessons from it sooner.
just some thoughts.
